Keep Moving

Gloria Sandford, LMHC

There is no such thing as neutral. We are either moving forward or backward. This is true for all areas of life—physically, socially, spiritually and most certainly emotionally. We talk about people becoming “set in their ways,” and by this we mean growing more and more calcified until no movement is possible. It is dangerous to stay put. We must keep moving. Doing the work in therapy is a courageous choice—to prefer the challenge of facing our feelings and our difficulties rather than letting them grow more dire. Most of us wait until the last minute, until doing nothing becomes untenable. The pain of our situations is often just the impetus we need to face toward a future solution instead of continuing to Band-Aid our current problems. 

To move forward, we must engage the reality of our lives even—and especially—when it hurts. The metaphor of the physical world helps us to understand the emotional one as well. Recently, after a hospitalization, my mother was told by her physical therapist that one day lying in bed nullifies the effects of three days of physical therapy. If this is true, we can’t afford to stay put, physically or emotionally. Talking with someone about our pain, taking time and space to feel our fears and grieve our losses, is essential to being able to walk in a new way. This is movement forward that will eventually feel good and strong, free from pain. Sometimes it is hard. There may be more to unlearn before we can build new skills. We can’t stop there. Where we are on our journey is not the point. What matters is taking the next step.